What is the purpose of influence?

To speak for those who have no influence!

• Saturday is a day of disappointment and failed expectation: "What was that all about? He's gone: dead and buried."
  
• Saturday is a day of doubt: "Didn't He say he was going to establish a new kingdom?"
  
• Saturday is a day filled with fear. "Will they be coming after me next?" (remember, Peter was recognized as one of His followers - three times in the high priest's courtyard!)
  
• Saturday is pretty powerless. "What happened to all the miraculous? Why didn't He come down off the cross and show them...like when He walked on water!?"
  

The young couple invited their elderly pastor for Sunday dinner. While they were in the kitchen preparing the meal, the minister asked their son what they were having.

"Goat," the little boy replied.
"Goat?" replied the startled pastor, "Are you sure about that?"
"Yep," said the youngster. "I heard Dad say to Mom, 'Today is just as good as any to have the old goat for dinner.'"  

It's Sunday - good morning, Lord!  Thank You for giving me this day.

I will smile as the joy of your salvation is my strength!  Now it's time to get ready for celebration.

As I shower and wash my face, I pray, Father, wash my sins away.

As I dress, I pray, Father, cover our congregation.

Hide us under the shadow of Your wings, cover us with the full armor of God that we may not encounter evil or harm of any kind.

As I eat my breakfast, I pray, Father, fill us with Your Word and Your Truth this day. Let us digest and embrace it, that we may become more like You in every way.

As I clear the table and wash the dishes, I pray, Father, bless all those who are serving You today.

• Bless the ministers and their families, the musicians, the singers, and those behind the scenes.

• Bless the hands that have prepared the bulletin, the news we're about to read.

• Bless those who cook and clean, maintain and prepare.

• Bless the teachers. May they rightly divide Your Word and bring a portion to us today.

• Bless each home, family and marriage.  Guide each husband and wife.

• Bless with wisdom each father and mother, teach each daughter and son.

As I gather my Bible and my keys, I pray, Father, may pastor's words throughout the SCV be anointed as they share what You have imparted to them out of Your Holy Word.

Watch over the tithes and offerings, every thought, idea and plan, that all that we do be in alignment with You, bringing You pleasure through each woman and man.

Now Father, one more thing I ask - bless us each and every one.

May all that we do be pleasing to You!

To the Glory of the Father!

In the Name of the Son!

In the Power of the Holy Spirit! 

ADULT: A person who has stopped growing at both ends and is now growing in the middle.

BEAUTY PARLOR: A place where women curl up and dye.

CANNIBAL: Someone who is fed up with people.

CHICKENS: The only animals you eat before they are born and after they are dead.

COMMITTEE: A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours.

DUST: Mud with the juice squeezed out

EGOTIST: Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation.

HANDKERCHIEF: Cold Storage.

INFLATION: Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.

  [more coming soon]

A young priest arrives at the monastery. He is assigned to helping the other priest in copying the old canons and laws of the church by hand.

He notices, however, that all of the priests are copying from copies, not from the original manuscript.  So, the new priest goes to the Bishop to question this, pointing out that if someone made even a small error in the first copy, it would never be picked up! In fact, that error would be continued in all of the subsequent copies.

The Bishop says, 'We have been copying from the copies for centuries, but you make a good point, my son.'

He goes down into the dark caves underneath the monastery where the original manuscripts are held as archives in a locked vault that hasn't been opened for hundreds of years.

Hours go by and nobody sees the old Bishop.  .

So, the young priest gets worried and goes down to look for him. He sees him banging his head against the wall and wailing,

'We missed the R! We missed the R! We missed the R!'

His forehead is all bloody and bruised and he is crying uncontrollably. The young priest asks the old Bishop, 'What's wrong, father?'

With a choking voice, the old Bishop replies…

'The word was...'celebRate'!!!

Why did Jesus fold the linen burial cloth after His resurrection?

The Gospel of John (20: 7) tells us that the cloth, which was placed over the face of Jesus, was not just thrown aside like the grave clothes.  The Bible takes an entire verse to tell us that the napkin was neatly folded, and was placed at the head of that stony coffin.

Is that important?  You'd better believe it!  Is that significant?  Absolutely!  Is it really significant?  Yes!

In order to understand the significance of the folded napkin, you have to understand a little bit about Hebrew tradition of that day. 

The folded napkin had to do with the Master and Servant, and every Jewish boy knew this tradition.  When the servant set the dinner table for the master, he made sure that it was exactly the way the master wanted it.  The table was furnished perfectly, and then the servant would wait, just out of sight, until the master had finished eating, and the servant would not dare touch that table, until the master was finished.

Now if the master had finished eating, he would rise from the table, wipe his fingers, his Mouth and clean his beard, and would wad up that napkin and toss it onto the table.  The servant would then know to clear the table.  In those days, the wadded napkin meant, "I'm done".  But if the Master got up from the table, and folded his napkin, and laid it beside his plate, the servant would not dare touch the table, because the servant knew that the folded napkin meant, "I'm not finished yet".

The folded napkin meant, "I'm coming back!"  

He is Coming Back!